GypsySpirit Every animal has something to teach us, better yet, to remind us about life’s simplicity and its most basic concepts for health and vitality; aka, essential knowledge to be aware of in order to have a good life. At this moment in time, I’m thinking about bears and their hibernation cycles and how we, too, need to hibernate through certain seasons of our lives.
I learned this very young and understood that there are times in life when not much seems to be going on. Quiet times when we’re inside more and going out less. We no longer want to be in the “thick of things” or the hustle and bustle of daily life. A time when we want less to do with people and the society we were forced to be born into.
I have found these “hibernations” to be so productive and life-enhancing. Each and every one of these times has played a vital role in my exponential spiritual growth that propels me into the next chapter of my life. These times are especially healing and life-changing for a curious personality like mine. That is, the type of curiosity that runs deep towards human nature, spirituality, personal growth, and the whys of the universe. I’m equal parts a dreamer and a doer. I like to dream and then act upon them. These hibernations are necessary for my emotional well-being, mental health, and spiritual growth. Making use of this time can be a deep act of self-love.
Many, many years ago, I did a temperament test that revealed how much I need to be away from people in my daily life. My work must involve the least amount of contact with people in order to be in good spirits. It revealed how much people can stress me out and deplete my energy. Nothing could be more true. I enjoy being around people, but only when I want to initiate socialization. I must not be forced to do it. To me, these are healthy boundaries. Lucky me, I had researched jobs of the future at the age of 15 in the 90s and I chose finance; a very people-less profession. Phew!
Now, I have gone through periods where I’m not hibernating and feel like socializing and being out and about. As I get older, those times get to be less extensive. I no longer need validation from relationships. My worth as a human being and a woman does not come from the relationships I have in my life nor the quantity of them. It is in fact during these hibernations that I’ve learned to let go of relying on those worldly attachments to make me “feel” important or significant. In the end, it is all mainly a personal journey. I’m happy to spend time with myself. I can be with my own thoughts and enjoy my own company. I do as I please when I please. True freedom, especially of the mind, is very rare.
With our hectic everyday life and the crazy state the world is in, it’s never been more important to learn to detach. From anything. We humans are so funny in how we get attached to locations, people, a house, a car, a job, a daily routine, a route to work, a drink, a food- you name it! The only thing that is certain in this life is change. We must adapt to changes that come every day, every year, every decade.
I’m going through one of my hibernation periods right now after traveling to 5 countries last year and creating lots of memorable life experiences in less than a year. Recently, I’ve been in a place I like to call the abyss. A black hole. My son jokingly calls it a “military psyop” type of place. I’ve been in Florida. Just today while watching a movie, a character was talking about an ex, and the other character asked “Want me to take them out?” Character #1 said “It’s alright. He moved to Florida. Life already took him out.” LMAO
Every time I’ve lived here there has been a hibernation. I come to life the moment I leave. I’m currently planning to leave in 6 months. Each time I move here I last less and less time. As I type this it’s been a whole pregnancy that I’ve been here. Nine whole months. It’s been what you would expect from a pregnancy- uncomfortable, irritating, swollen, bloated, and just plain mind-numbing. However, what you do during said times is what matters. When I first landed here against my will I was very upset, but as the true optimist that I am, I found a way to make it a useful, efficient, and productive time. I took it into my own hands to nurture my creative energy. I’m doing some of my favorite activities which, granted, would be immensely enhanced by stunning views, scenic drives, and energizing mountainous landscapes that include an ocean, but are nevertheless enjoyable despite the flat nothingness I’m surrounded by.
I have given birth to my next dream in the next stage of my lifelong journey. In these nine months, I gave birth to:
- A certification from Harvard Business School.
- Significant progress on another certification I’ve been procrastinating on, as a Financial Modeling & Valuation Analyst.
- Ten new clients in the virtual world (some in the place I used to call home: California)
- Increased business income meeting one of my long time goals.
- The return to my favorite hobby of day trading with a clear mind
- Paid off debt (God that feels so good every time!)
- Increased my credit score (close to reaching a level I need for a certain goal!!)
- Time with my college-age children again after they had left home
- Time with my grand-doggies I didn’t see for 8 months because of traveling overseas.
- Reading several books. (my most cherished hobby) One of which was to improve my day trading!
- The completion of two mindset programs.
- Renewed love for working out again (thank you Jovan! And Isis for joining us and making it a family thing!!)
- Much-needed reflection time.
- A therapeutic trip to stunning Lake Tahoe, California to spend laughing-til-it-hurts time with my best friend since 15 years old.
- The ability to support my daughter in the start of her own freelancing practice and her short hiatus from college.
- A curated new plan starting April/May 2024. A plan so big it’s what dreams and real life are made of. One worth living. Of course, it involves an overseas move and lots more travel (one of my favorite uses of time ever).
All of this has happened in only nine months because I decided to take advantage of my hibernation and honed in even deeper on my journey of self-love and self-discovery.
So, while we must go through the labor pains, transitioning into a new chapter of your life can be some of the most important times when used with the intention to curate good-for-the-soul change and forward progress. You will dream some of your biggest dreams during these hibernations and have the opportunity to do shit that will make them come true. This can bring with it a deeper sense of self-love and a more positive self-image.
It starts with the care of your own needs, alone or not. I can see how this is catastrophic for some people and why they avoid spending time with themselves. Yet the more they avoid it, the more painful these times are when they come forcefully. Let me tell you they will come because it is exactly what we came here for: growth and expansion. You can’t grow and expand when you’re too anchored to certain things, certain places, and certain people.
It’s something you must do on your own time at your own pace.
Yes, you can do this even while living with other people. It’s called setting boundaries. Too many people don’t seek this necessary solitude to reflect on the choices they’ve made in the past that have brought them to where they are today. They’re stuck in patterns, loopholes, and comfort zones. These times are critical to assess what it is one wants out of life in the months, years, and decades to come. Most humans I know are just floating on a raft letting the winds take them wherever. I was like this in my 20s. I had to learn that this way of being didn’t bring me to the best situations for myself. I wasn’t living too intentionally in certain areas of my life. I was happy to let it all roll off my shoulder and let life take me where it wanted. Although I’m grateful I learned this lesson, I don’t operate that way anymore.
For the last two decades I’ve allowed for these quiet times to rest and teach me things about myself I could never learn while surrounded by people and their different energies. It is during these times that I’ve learned what I like and don’t like, what I want and don’t want in my life…
..and that, my friends, is how you live intentionally and hopefully find a sense of inner peace. Make your own plans, make your own decisions, live in the present moment, and decide what life is bringing you next. Don’t just sit there waiting for it to just maybe, hopefully, possibly bring it to you.
Humans tend to cling on for dear life. Even a lifelong dream can be an attachment we’re clinging to, which we then use as an excuse to allow things in our lives no human being should ever allow. Such as limited thinking. Reduced self-respect. Neglect. Abuse in every shape or form. Belittling. Indifference. Playing it small. Other people’s opinions.
When you’ve let go of all attachment and laser focus on self love, acceptance, and the nurturing of those grandiose dreams, that, my friends, is what I consider to be true freedom in this earthly plane.
